death of neighbor

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hlf2888
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death of neighbor

Post by hlf2888 » Wed Dec 13, 2017 12:31 pm

I know his family and wonder what the custom would be? He was old, it was not surprising. Can I bring over some muffins?

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Gloria
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Re: death of neighbor

Post by Gloria » Wed Dec 13, 2017 1:41 pm

They are not used to food offerings so just say " Mis condolencias" or " lo siento" ..stay a little and if you don't know anyone, just leave.
I'm from the generation of common sense, wisdom and unfiltered answers. Anótese, comuníquese, publíquese, archívese. I sayeth as I seeth.

Donnybrook
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Re: death of neighbor

Post by Donnybrook » Wed Dec 13, 2017 4:49 pm

Food is not part of the Chilean grieving process. If you can/want go to the funeral as they will be grateful you are there. If not, just offer your condolences and ask if there is anything you can do.

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hlf2888
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Re: death of neighbor

Post by hlf2888 » Thu Dec 14, 2017 11:23 am

I had to go a few minutes after my post so I used my judgement and brought the pastries. The daughter and son greeted me with a hug and seemed grateful for the pastries. There was a house full of people I did not know. I said " cuando las personas están tristes, todavía necesitan comer." They were at a table with dishes and food. Now they have more food. It was not a bad thing.

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Putenio
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Re: death of neighbor

Post by Putenio » Thu Dec 14, 2017 2:44 pm

I've been to the funeral of a senator (speeches, more theatrical) in the city and to the velorio, or the several day (3?) attending period in the rural campo where you go, sit with the family, and the body is presented in a formal casket in the middle of the living room, candles and flowers all around, and hymns. Then they serve everyone food, and if there are lot of people, they do it in shifts - benches and tables. We've helped with food prep, but have not taken muffins or a casserole. For my neighbors, it is the being present that counts, and then later standing around outside under the stars talking, and sometimes just being with no conversation at all.

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frozen-north
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Re: death of neighbor

Post by frozen-north » Sat Dec 16, 2017 7:58 am

hlf2888 wrote:
I had to go a few minutes after my post so I used my judgement and brought the pastries. The daughter and son greeted me with a hug and seemed grateful for the pastries. There was a house full of people I did not know. I said " cuando las personas están tristes, todavía necesitan comer." They were at a table with dishes and food. Now they have more food. It was not a bad thing.
I think it was a very nice gesture from your part, and, with the context of what you said, I think it will be well appreciated.

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